Posts Correctly guessing someone’s wifi password is the closest I’ll ever come to being a hacker. Apr 6, 2015
Posts It doesn’t matter if you’re male or female, old or young, beautiful or ugly…duckface is as attractive as fartface. Apr 8, 2015
Aphorisms Springtime does to the rest of the animal kingdom what wine and chocolate do to us. Apr 21, 2015
Posts Our governor wants to deploy troops to stave off an impending military invasion by Obama. A mental illness of that magnitude should be grounds for removal from office. May 6, 2015
Posts The ability to have a conversation without taking or making it personal is disappointingly rare. May 8, 2015
Aphorisms There’s literally billions of people whom will be annoyed by this sentence, and alot of its because your not. May 8, 2015
Posts The guy next to me has an epic set of dreadlocks, an incredibly pensive look on his face, and he’s sketching on his cocktail napkin. I bet that napkin is worth more than my car. May 19, 2015
Posts Dear California, Your water was delivered to us by mistake. Please come pick it up as soon as possible. Sincerely, Texas May 26, 2015
Posts One of the things this world needs is a death metal version of Bobby McFerrin’s “Don’t Worry Be Happy.” #noreally May 27, 2015
Posts I just submitted my book for publication. On a related note, it sure is hard to type with your fingers crossed. Jun 1, 2015
Posts You might be a geek if you have to decide how to safely and legally transport swords when you move. Jun 6, 2015
Aphorisms When you ignore or excuse an abuse of power, you are partly to blame when it happens again. Jun 9, 2015